Can cinemas tempt us from our sofas?

Welcome news for all film lovers – cinemas are re-opening at the end of July. Watching movies on television from the comfort of your sofa is pleasant enough and it’s certainly cheap. Plus you get exactly the choice of snacks and drinks you want, and can press pause anytime you like for a handy loo break or a quick trip to the kitchen to refresh your glass. But it’s not really the same, is it? There’s no sense of an occasion, of travelling to a place whose sole purpose is to enable you to watch films in (reasonable) comfort on a big screen with no distractions except the occasional rustling of sweet wrappers.

The dilemma at the moment is that the main studios are reluctant to release their big films at a time when they’re so uncertain of the audience. Will people flock back to the cinemas in droves or stay away in droves? It’s risky. So, Cineworld has addressed this problem by deciding to show what they consider to be classic films. It’s an interesting list and it certainly doesn’t feature the Marx Brothers, Meryl Streep or Mickey Mouse.

The films that Cineworld hopes will tempt you from your cocoon include The Shawshank Redemption, Blade Runner, The Empire Strikes Back, Terminator 2, Goodfellas, Labyrinth (which has David Bowie in it, so can’t be all bad) and the Back to the Future trilogy. They’re obviously not trying to tempt me back. Not only would I not leave my sofa for any of those titles, I’d take evasive action if I were in any danger of having to watch most of them.

Obviously I’m not the intended audience, but it did start me thinking about what would tempt me back to the cinema. It definitely wouldn’t be Citizen Kane (once was enough), but I’ve never seen Lawrence of Arabia, and the vast desertscapes (filmed in Jordan and Morocco) would be fabulous to see on a big screen. It is a 1960s film and I can imagine that its portrayal of westerners and Arabs would be highly embarrassing to modern sensibilities. I do know that historically it’s on incredibly shaky ground and that T.E. Lawrence certainly isn’t a hero in the Middle East, but I’m sure it would be visually stunning. Maurice Jarre’s music is wonderful and I’d also get the opportunity to admire lots of camels and to marvel at Peter O’Toole’s blue eyes. Noel Coward said that if Peter O’Toole had been any prettier they’d have had to rename it Florence of Arabia.

I’d definitely go and see Casablanca again, if only to see Humphrey Bogart in his dashing hat mumble his way through those famous lines “we’ll always have Paris” and “I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship”. However, my preferred choice would be Thelma and Louise because (1) I’ve never seen it; (2) it was filmed in Utah and California and looks amazing; and (3) it’s a film about women in their own right rather than their usual supporting role as props to the male-centred story. Which is more than can be said for most movies. Although I gather that it doesn’t end well.

I’ll just have to make do with the small screen for now. I’ve noticed that the old Dick Van Dyke shows from the 60s are now available and I’m very tempted, despite the lack of camels.