What’s in the box?

No-one wants to be left behind and I’m always curious about the latest trends, as long as they’re fairly legal and not too repulsive. I like knowing what TikTok is, as well as Twitch (I’m so cutting-edge!), even though it’s highly unlikely that I’ll ever use either of them. Life is short and there is fig chutney to make, but I don’t want the world to pass me by, leaving me marooned in some distant time. On the whole I‘m happy just being vaguely aware of what’s going on, but there are some trends I definitely wish I’d never heard of.

A few day ago I was chatting with some of the younger members in my family (such a great source of information) about the popularity of “unboxing videos”, in which people take new things out of boxes for the enjoyment of millions. I have definitely experienced the thrill of opening a beautifully wrapped gift when it’s got my name on it, but the joy of watching a random stranger taking a new phone from its packaging is something I just don’t get. Now, a video showing you how to prune your clematis, that I get. Perhaps I’m not so cutting-edge after all…

However, it’s children who are the main target audience for these odd videos. Or maybe childish adults. A 9-year-old American boy has become YouTube’s top earner (three years in a row) by “unboxing”, reviewing and playing with toys. In theory, these videos are aimed at children, but I did wonder why a Ford advert was running across the bottom of the one I watched. It all feels a bit creepy and exploitative. This boy is obviously very rich and I imagine he’ll need all that money for therapy when he’s an adult trying to come to terms with the strangeness of his childhood.

Then things took a much weirder turn when I was introduced to videos of people destroying phones. In theory, they’re testing their durability, but surely phones weren’t built to withstand being scratched with a craft knife, gouged with a screwdriver and bent backwards on their hinges? I cannot tell you how painful it was watching a man (it always seems to be a man) destroying a brand new phone. And his soothing, calm voice made it so much worse – really quite sinister. Obviously lots of people enjoy watching these things, which is disturbing enough, but to me such wanton destruction is almost obscene and I was starting to feel nostalgic for the videos of children playing with toys.

After this wallow around the seedier side of the internet, I felt the need for some light relief, so I searched for videos of Zoom calls going wrong. I love the ones where children interrupt important calls or people can’t remove filters of themselves as cats. Talking cats, so much more wholesome. No therapy needed at all.