Are we having fun yet?

I have just read an article about the importance of fun, which, predictably, made me worry that there wasn’t enough fun in my life. So I read the article very closely to find out if I was getting my allotted quota and if not, how I should go about it. Luckily the journalist Catherine Price has written a book called The Power of Fun, in which she sets out three key ingredients: playfulness, connectedness and flow.  Sorry, Adriene, but yoga does not qualify as fun and neither does plonking yourself in front of the television. I can see that watching Dopesick might not be everyone’s idea of fun, but I think that watching Gogglebox (in which, if you haven’t seen it, real non-celeb people provide a running commentary on what they’re watching on TV) has all three ingredients and it makes me laugh out loud. Surely that’s fun?

Sadly not. Apparently it has to be active fun rather than passive enjoyment. Examples of active fun are cold-water swimming, roller skating, dancing and taking part in quiz nights. Hmmm, it’s not looking good. I started to question whether I was having any fun at all and if not, why not. Surely attending live shows such as stand-up comedy should count? I went to see Jenny Eclair last week and I suppose you could describe my participation as passive, but there was definitely a sense of playfulness and connectedness between the comedian on stage bemoaning the trials of turning 60 and all the middle-aged women in the audience, laughing and nodding in recognition. Also some very brave men. When Jenny Eclair described how jigsaws featured in her lockdown life and specifically mentioned doing the “Cats in Positano” one I nearly fell out of my chair. I have done that very jigsaw. And I think if you’re not looking at your watch, wondering when it will be time for that glass of wine in the interval, then you are riding a wave of flow. So, playful, connected, flow = fun. Such a relief: I can pass on the cold-water swimming.

Not so fast. It turns out that I’m failing in other respects as well. It used to be that taking up an instrument or learning a new language held the key to keeping those brain synapses sparking away, but according to the article my (adult) children are right and we all need to play more board games to keep our thinking skills in top form, while having fun at the same time. Gone are the days when we happily played undemanding games like Snakes and Ladders. They have moved on, but I haven’t and whenever I try to play one of their games, I get hopelessly confused by the long list of incredibly complicated rules and I have no doubt that this sense of uselessness contributes actively to my mental decline. My brain wanders and I think wistfully of those cats in Positano or, better still, me in Positano.

I have decided I need to develop my own recipe for fun. Roller skating and Catan will not feature. Neither will I read any more articles on how to have fun. My idea of fun seems to involve some combination of friends, coffee, food, theatres and cinemas. Although I have to admit to a secret yearning to learn Bollywood dancing. Screw in a lightbulb, pet the dog – I’m ready!