Give me any challenge as long as it’s simple

I like a challenge as long as it’s not too hard and requires only the smallest effort on my part. A full marathon? Never. Half a marathon? Also, never. I can just about cope with Adriene’s 30-day yoga challenge in January. I can’t say I enjoy it exactly, but I know it’s good for me. And I like her – she’s a sunny presence in a dark and gloomy month, a bit like the first snowdrops. I would never do dry January. No amount of Adriene or snowdrops could compensate for such deprivation.

I also take part in a 30-day French challenge from time to time, which I do enjoy. Not much sticks in my creaky brain, but it’s fun while it lasts and gives me the illusion of achieving something. Proper challenges, though, I leave to other people. I don’t really understand the whole idea if I’m honest. Why would anyone want to climb Everest? I know that the mountaineer George Mallory’s famous reply was “Because it’s there,” but I think that argument is deeply flawed. The world is full of tall things that are undeniably there, but do people really need to climb them? People who slog up mountains say the view is wonderful, but surely that’s what cable cars are for.

Now I’ve just read about the world’s first “turbine bagger”. I know that people “bag Munros” – climbing all the Scottish mountains over 3000 feet. (I have just looked up Munros and it turns out they’re named after Sir Hugh Munro, who produced the first list of these mountains. I had no idea.) I can just about understand the appeal. The views must be breath-taking (when you can see through the mist and rain) and I bet they’re poorly served by cable cars.

The turbine bagger in question was recovering from cancer and decided that walking would help to build up her strength and stamina. The country was in lockdown at the time, so she headed to nearby Whitelee Windfarm for fresh air and lots of space. Noticing that all the turbines were numbered, she set herself the challenge of walking to all 215 of them. I know that not everyone appreciates the industrial chic of a wind turbine, but I do. From the road. I certainly wouldn’t go out of my way to visit them, but then lockdown was another place and another time.

I was relieved to learn about a new and undemanding challenge that I can take on in June. It’s the “30 Days Wild” challenge and the idea is to do one wild thing every day throughout the month. No, it doesn’t involve painting your naked body and running through the streets shouting “I’m free.” It’s a nature challenge and some of the most popular activities last year were wildlife-watching, eating outdoors, planting wildflower seeds and listening to birdsong. I have to admit that it’s a bit tame, even by my standards. Isn’t anyone planning to build a bivouac in a lonely forest or go white-water rafting down a treacherous river? Not that I’d do any of those things, but I’d like to think other people were.

Anyway, I must finish – I’m off to feed the birds. I’m in training for my June challenge.