I’ve been thinking about saints this week, for various reasons. I’m doing an online course with the National Gallery and saints crop up a lot in paintings. I was also reading that the Catholic church has started proceedings to canonise a 21-year-old man called Pedro Ballester, who died in 2018. The First Gen Z saint, apparently. We are familiar with saints of old, but I wonder how many news ones are made? And how do they decide?
Everyone was celebrating Sir David Attenborough’s 100th birthday last week and surely he is a saint in human form. If he were a Catholic, he’d have to be a shoe-in for ultimate beatification and canonisation. I think the Catholic church is missing out here – they should definitely spread their sainthood net wider. Just think of the wonderful members they could invite to join that elite throng.
Not only would they have St David of Leicester, but what about Malala Yousafzai? She is truly impressive and much jollier than most people would imagine (her guest appearance in the television series We Are Lady Parts, about a Muslim women’s punk band, is truly inspired and hilarious) and, when her time came, I think she would make a great addition to the heavenly realm. It could certainly use a bit of livening up, judging by the dreary gang portrayed in old master paintings. St Sebastian permanently pierced by arrows, Saint Lucy offering her eyes on a plate and St Bartholomew holding his own skin, they really don’t seem like cheery company.
Not being a Catholic isn’t the only hurdle – prospective saints also have to be able to demonstrate two verified miracles. Obviously, they can’t do the verifying from beyond the grave, their supporters need to petition on their behalf. St David of Leicester has frolicked with mountain gorillas, which is truly miraculous. He’s also lived 100 years without seemingly alienating or offending anyone. That’s at least two miracles already.
Malala miraculously survived being shot at close range, but I don’t know if she has achieved any other miracles. Still, she’s young and has lots of time her wonders to perform. I have faith.
It was my birthday this week and, although I felt somewhat overshadowed by Sir David’s centenary, I’m in pretty good company. David Byrne of Talking Heads fame, was born on the same day as me. I have always loved the Talking Heads –The Road to Nowhere and Once in a Lifetime are among their many classics – and I’m delighted to share my birthday with their lead singer and songwriter. I’m also happy to be celebrating along with Cate Blanchett and Greg Davies, but not so pleased about Mark Zuckerberg trying to get in on the action.
I was hoping that some maverick or even memorable saints shared my birthday, but it wasn’t to be. Who’s heard of St Erembert or St Carthach the Younger? Definitely Z list. I wonder when Pedro Ballister was born…